Chipwrecked

I'm all about food. I should be...I work at a grocery store. I live, breathe, and ah...eat it. Every single day. I see the good, the bad, and the "what the H were they thinking?"

Take chips, for instance. On Saturdays before leaving, I browse through each aisle looking for a treat. One needs that special treat when one's watching TV late at night, am I right girls? Sooo...here I go, looking for that special something when what do I see? Hot Dog-flavored potato chips. Yes, you read that right.

OMG...is nothing sacred? I don't know about you, but when I eat a hot dog, I want the chips nestled beside my dog, not in it. Besides, if you skip the dogs entirely, aren't you putting a lot of people at the hot dog packaging plants out of work?

Let's not forget the hot-dog buns. Two industries; dead. Kaput. Wait! What about wherever the meat comes from? (No, I don't know and don't tell me and yes, I do know they don't come from trees. How dumb do you think I am? Don't answer that, it's one of those retro questions) But doesn't this strange combination of chips put those folks out of biz as well?

Food science has gone crazy, if you ask me. It's a dang chipwreck! Already there are:

• dill pickle potato chips
• BLT (bacon, lettuce and tomato) chips
• ketchup potato chips (um...I LOVE these...they should call them Ketchips!)
• pizza-tasting chips
• sour cream
• Parmesan and herb
• salt and vinegar
• BBQ, Onion, and on and on.

So why am I ranting about chips? Think about it...if this industry is so smart, why haven't they made any chocolate-flavored chips? Margarita-flavored chips? OREO-FLAVORED CHIPS, for Pete's sake? How hard could it be?

I'm thinking of boycotting the entire industry (except the Ketchips) until they meet my demands. Who's with me?

JJ - Once again tirelessly thinking for the entire world. Sigh...I doooo what I cannn.

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